Helen DeSantis Tanner

My Italian grandmother (my dad's mom) passed away on Tuesday, June 17. I went up to Utah for the funeral.

Helen DeSantis Tanner Helen DeSantis Tanner, age 91 of Springville, passed away Tuesday, June 17, 2008. She was born February 19, 1917 in Frontier, Wyoming to Henry DeSantis and Elvira Vennarucci. She married John Tanner on May 16, 1941 in Salt Lake City, Utah. Helen was raised and attended schools in Wyoming, moving to Utah in 1942 and has lived in Springville since 1946. She loved square and ballroom dancing. She also enjoyed playing bridge. Helen was an excellent cook. She is survived by her husband of Springville, two sons: Paul (Mel) Tanner of Duchesne, Roy (Joann) Tanner of Kirksville, Missouri; 13 grandchildren and 19 great-grandchildren. Graveside services will be held Saturday, June 21, 2008 at 11 a.m. in the Springville Evergreen Cemetery. Friends may call at Wheeler Mortuary, 211 East 200 South in Springville on Saturday from 9:30 to 10:30 prior to the services. Condolences may be sent at www.wheelermortuary.com Published in the Daily Herald on 6/19/2008.

It was definitely her time. She's been suffering for a while, and she's in a better place now. The last time my dad spoke to her, she said something like "I don't know where we go from here." I believe she meant that she didn't see any possible road to recovery. That's a tough spot to be in, and we were glad for the suffering to be over.

But it will take a little getting used to the idea. Ever since I've been alive, my dad's parents have been in that same house in Springville that my grandpa built himself, probably more than 60 years ago. Ever since I can remember, whenever we went for a visit we've always played cards with them, usually progressive rummy. We always sat at that same table with the chairs that swing in and out that they've always had. We always had homemade cookies and ice cream. We would talk to Grandpa about sports and to Grandma about bridge. Grandma would usually yell at Grandpa for something or other.

Some things seem like they've always been the same, and they'll always be the same. When those things change, it's like a wake up call, it's like you're waking up from a dream, and you realize that reality isn't what you thought it was a moment ago. And then you have to ask, "Where do we go from here?" And hopefully you have a good answer.